If you want to run further, just run!

Date: Sunday, November 30, 2020

Distance: 10 miles

Listened to: Entire Hamilton musical!

It has been my longest break since updating my blog and that is probably because I feel I have not had much to say. The summer months passed in blur with a knee niggle and aching hip bringing me up short but I still ran when I could. I kind of lost my temper with it all when I felt I had lost all the fitness I had built up in March and April, but stubbornly stuck at it.

Then I started to get foot pain too and I feared I had a stress fracture or reaction, but really did not want to go to a hospital in COVID times for a scan. My theory was that I could cope with pain as long as I knew I was not doing further damage to myself, so I cracked on.

Wise old runners will probably be guffawing into their their snoods right now. Did I really believe I could keep running without picking up the odd injury or two or at the very least not experiencing pain of some kind?

I think I was frustrated and anxious in equal measure. Frustrated that I felt my progress had been halted, anxious about COVID, frustrated I could not run to relieve my worries about COVID, anxious my injuries would not go away, and then the cycle starts all over again!

One highlight of July was re-running the Kingsbridge 10k, albeit on my own. A really tough course that does not fill anyone with joy but I was interested to see how much I had improved since taking it on two years previously. I still could not get under the hour mark but managed to take eight minutes off my previous time, so all good.

I wobbled though August and gave myself a talking to ahead of September. I signed up for a local 10k race for early 2021, telling myself that I would build back up slowly. Ha! I ran 75 miles in September with every right foot strike causing discomfort and a funky limp ensuing the day after each run.

I did not sign up for any challenges in October to give my foot a break, but still managed a 16km run for my cousin’s Tait to mark his 16th birthday and recorded my fastest 5km (27min 55 secs). I also did some group runs with friends (not something I am confident about), including that bloomin’ Kingsbridge 10k again! My utterly inspirational friend Marissa (peach top) wanted to be shown the route in all its sickening glory. So we showed her….see below 🙂

November started with a biggie. I had always wanted to do the ‘run to the sea’ route (Kingsbridge to Thurlestone) and agreed to go with two of my friends, Cath and Abs (turquoise and pink tops above), and somehow convinced them to run back too! It started my month off with an 11-miler, so signed up for another 75-mile challenge as England headed into another lockdown and shorter days. This meant another first. I bought a headtorch and flashing lights so I could run in the dark. That light certainly picks out the rats as you run past the estuary!

I easily reached 50 miles by the midway point so pushed my challenge to 100 miles…and then it got hard! Dark nights, lots of works and Mum-admin, general fatigue, and COVID disappointment made running hard again.

BUT. Big ‘but’ there. I am know I am guilty of not appreciating how far I have come. It’s good to have a look at your running app and remind yourself of the runs you have done sometimes. I ended up doing two half marathons in November. One was to remember Tait a year after his death and to honour a friend’s friend who had also passed away. The other was a solo ‘run to the sea’ that would have ended up being 12.5 miles by the time I got home so I had to crawl 0.6 more!

I’m still not back to the fitness I had built up at the start of the year but the old aches and pains have given up bugging me, but hopefully I can start to crack the hills I used to run again and see if I can extend my distances.

I have viewed the last few months as the ‘resilience building’ months. I think we have all had to build up mental resilience during 2020. It’s been totally rubbish to not to see or hug people who may not live with us but we love all the same. We have all felt very isolated at times. Nothing is normal.

I hope the extra miles will count at some point and that I have built some mental strength. I would consider myself a mentally strong person, but running is definitely an area I lack confidence, especially when I am with others, or just fail to find the will to carry on. The monthly challenges have definitely had a positive effect on the latter. My deadline mentality means I have never failed one of these challenges yet. I have certainly gone out when I did not want to and have gone further than I wanted to too.

Last thing. On one of my recent runs, I was listening to a podcast – Deep Roots – by adventurer and former rugby player Damian Browne. He talks about a very shaky moment on day one of his solo Talisker Whisky Atlantic Challenge. He asked himself three questions and he says his answers saved his race. They were:

1. What are you here to do? Row the Atlantic.

2. How do you do that? Well, you f**king row!

3. What good is another second, minute or day spent lamenting mistakes and misfortunes? None.

You will be relieved to hear that I am not not planning on rowing the Atlantic any time soon but this did resonate with me and these would be my questions:

1. What do you want to do? Run longer distances.

2. How do you do that? Keep running you fool!

3. What good is another second, minute or day spent lamenting that I am not as fast or fit as other people? None whatsoever.

I liked the brutal simplicity of these questions and I am taking them with me. If I want to run further, I need to keep running! Crazy concept. Thanks Damo. And thanks to the people who have been encouraging me along the way too, especially my family and my local girlfriends who I sent WhatsApp updates to during yesterday’s 10-miler to get me to 100 miles. I needed a virtual cheering squad and they never let me down.

I’m sure the support networks along with the mental and physical resilience, which we have all had to build up on the last nine months, will serve us well in the future. It is my dear hope that we all come out of the other side of COVID with the ability to be more awesome than we were before.